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You've Been Warned ReviewKristen is an avid photographer living in New York City in YOU'VE BEEN WARNED, the latest book to be churned out of the James Patterson factory. She's a good photographer and is close to making it big. Until the money starts rolling in, she works as a nanny for the two adorable kids of Michael and Penley Turnbull. Kristin seems like a normal 26-year old girl, except that weird things keep happening to her. She keeps having a reoccuring dream about four murders at a hotel. She keeps hearing a song in her head that she can't quite place. Some images in her photos are unexplainable, and she thinks she sees her dead father on the streets of Manhattan. Also, Kristen is having an affair with Michael Turnbull and expects him to leave Penley for her any day now. One night in a club, a stranger approaches her and tells her to be careful, and that now, she's "been warned."
Not counting the flying kids novels, this is the forth Patterson novel this year. He writes so many now that you can compare his novels to others quite easily to get a good idea of where they stand. STEP ON A CRACK had a poor sublot with the cop with ten kids. CROSS was great. The latest Women's Murder Club books have turned into 2 or 3 novellas combined to make a novel. THE QUICKIE grabbed me early and was full of twists. Definitely a great book. HONEYMOON faded at the end, BEACH ROAD featured a point of view gimmick, JUDGE AND JURY seemed like an afterthought, while LIFEGUARD was quite intriguing. You get my point, some Patterson books, are good, a few great, and many average. I believe there should be a new category shoud be created for YOU'VE BEEN WARNED. It sets a new standard for horrible awfulness regardless of what other book you judge it against.
The blurb on the inside jacket of the hardcover is SO misleading and tells you nothing about the type of book you are about to read. Sure, Kristen is a nanny and a photographer, But that in no way scratches the surface in what Patterson is trying to pull off here. In my opinion, the entire 374 pages of the novel is a beginning. This is a one note novel, with no turns, no transitions. I mentioned above the strange things that happen to Kristen, the dream, the music, the photos. None of it is ever explained. Strange things keep happening and piling on and Kristen keeps thinking she understands or is getting close to solving the mystery, before more strange things happen, and the reader is back at square one.
This is a gimmick novel, and it fails so miserably, it is hard to put into words. It is easy to read so you might want to check it out in the library just so you can get an idea for how bad it is. This is disappointing considering how much I enjoyed THE QUICKIE, but it is not unexpected because Patterson can be counted on to produce a clunker every third or forth effort. The last line of the inside cover blurb says "This novel of psychological suspense is a stunning new achievement for thriller master Patterson." There is no suspense, there are no thrills, only and endless cycle of unexplained occurrences that take the novel in a direction you don't expect by reading the blurb. And unfortunately, that direction is a place that no reader should ever be forced to go again.
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